At an Impasse

This winter has been an odd one.

Days of bitterly cold and snow, mixed with an almost spring-like warmth. High in the 50s one day, only to drop into the teens the next. Storms that brought 2-3 feet of snow followed by warm temps and rain, with the inevitable flooding that came with those fluctuations.

Life has been quiet, not much activity here, other than the various jobs around the house and some crafts and hobbies that keep us occupied.

I have spent some time out taking pictures and posting them on my photo blog Highways and Byways; using PhotoScape for some fun alterations and learning a little bit about post-processing techniques.

But I find myself at an impasse.

When it comes to writing, my mind is a blank. When I study my Bible, I find myself trying to find a lesson, something, anything, to write about. All to no avail.

When I read a book or watch TV, I try to find my own story to tell; but the words seem to shrivel up before they even form. Usually a Hallmark movie will give me an idea for a story of my own; but even with all the Christmas movies I watched, there was nothing forthcoming.

Where before I had words and ideas crowding into my thoughts, pushing to get out, now there is just silence.

Writing used to be my comfort zone, my place where I was filled with a purpose, and a peace that told me I was doing what I was meant to do. The words used to flow, God filling me with them even as my fingers flew across the keyboard.

But, now, trying to force the words to come, the ideas to form, has only caused frustration and a slowly building resignation. And the few words that do come, are stilted, hard, uneven.

Sure signs that they are not what they should be.

Pray, you say?

I have.

Nothing changes.

And I don’t know what to do about it.

 

© Drusilla Mott and https://drusillamott.wordpress.com, 2018

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5 thoughts on “At an Impasse

  1. I can totally relate to you. I’ve gone through dry seasons where I’ve felt like God was not there….I felt forsaken and alone. My prayers felt like they were bouncing off the walls. I had to speak to the enemy of my soul (sometimes out loud) and remind myself of God’s promises. I always fall back on one of my favorite scriptures….”Be still and know that I am God”.
    I love you my dear sister and I’m praying for you!
    Hugs

    Like

    • Thank you Temia. It seems you and I have more in common than we might have thought. 🙂 And thank you for your support, encouragement and prayers. I love you too. You have grown into a dear, dear friend.

      Like

  2. Pingback: Commit Your Way to God | On Faith and Writing

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